Trusting with a capital T
Updated: May 18, 2020
For years I wondered if I would ever find a deep love. And when I hit 28, let's just say I may have been a little jaded! But when I left my job out east 3 years ago and devoted time to focus on me during an intensive yoga training at the Sivananda Yoga Ashram in the Bahamas things began to shift. I began to see that I hadn't been very loving to the number one most important person in my life…you guessed it…ME! It is hard to explain the inner learnings that happened during this time, but 3 months later I left the ashram in the Bahamas with so much gratitude, trust, and a knowing that I was so ready to give and receive love again in all areas of my life. I of course didn’t know when I would meet “him”…but the universe would take care of all those details.
And then just one week upon returning back to my hometown, I bumped into this incredible man, who ironically went to elementary school with me! Just one week later, thanks universe! We chatted and then again bumped into each other a month later at our local coffee shop (the same place that I snapped this pick of him in yesterday). And since then, it has been a truly incredible journey together. Through the ups and downs, challenges and joys we have seen, I wouldn’t change any of it for it has made us who we are today and expanded us together.
Earlier this week was a celebration called ‘guru purnima’ – which in the yogic tradition is a festival to pay respect to all of the spiritual teachers in our lives. While the word guru – may bring visions to your mind of an old yogi with a beard, this is far from the true definition. The word guru is derived from two words, gu and ru. Gu (in Sanskrit) means darkness and Ru, means the remover of darkness. We all have these gurus in our life. When I went to a restorative yoga class as a student this week one of my beloved mentors shared this message and invited us to recall some of the special teachers in our life….well this brought back some pretty interesting flashbacks!
For me they have been an array of academic teachers, family members, friends, yoga teachers, even strangers who unknowingly have revealed great lessons when I needed them the most. And this man right here, has been one very special addition to that list. Every day he empowers me to be my true self, to follow my dreams, to combat my fears, to call my bullshit when need be (this took some getting used to!), and to choose to continue to see this lifetime with a lens of love. I believe our partners in life are there to reflect this concept of the dark and light parts that are in all of us, and I know that we have both done the same for each other. I share this because I once thought I might not ever find true love – that it just wasn’t for me and I’d be just fine without it! I am not saying one “needs” anyone to make them whole – as we are already ALL magnificent and loving as we are! What I shifted was more of the story I was telling myself and the walls I had put up that were selling myself short. We must believe that if we want a loving and wonderrful relationship, it is out there! We all deserve a life of love and happiness yet I see this so often in the language people use and how we tell ourselves these “stories” of what isn’t possible. When we change our thoughts, begin to trust our source, let love in, let go of our past hurts and live more in the present, the universe will be there to bring gifts into our lives when we least expect it. Even the hard times can be there to shift us in a way that we might not now understand, but it is a gift none the less. This past year of health challenges has deeply reminded me of this lesson, and again provided me with opportunity to re-align with what is truly important in my life.
Thanking the universe this week for all of my spiritual teachers that have crossed my path, and for bringing me together with my wonderful partner.
Let me know if you have a spiritual teacher you are thankful for in the comments below or via email!
I love hearing a good story :)
And to all of my teachers out there.........
I thank you <3